New York City cocks, don't they really suck? Oh, I meant 'cops.'

The Strokes
First Impressions of Earth
RCA, 2006

If you asked the Strokes what they sound like, they might be too bored or cool to tell you. But I'm not. One of the bands to "save rock" in the early 2000s, the Strokes were the great white hope for rich, pretentious hipper-than-thou caucasion kids everywhere. At least that year. And frankly, they weren't bad and still aren't.

But lemme tell ya what. I've read Velvet Underground comparisons, and while apt, I don't think you'll ever catch Julian Casablancas singing songs about heroin or black girls. Maybe you will, but being so immersed in hipster pussy and the art scene (I mean, probably, right?), I'd say that the odds of him ever being that direct and seedy are unlikely. Instead, you'll hear him singing lines of faux-poetry or lines about parties, where he presumably dives right into those waifish modelesque ladies. Unless he's into dudes.

What you really need to know about the Strokes is this: they are the U2 for the kids who are too cool for U2. Casablancas' voice sounds like Bono's probably would after a couple bottles of cheap wine. But ya know, that's not such a bad thing. They may be pretentious, but the songs stand on their own enough to cut through a lot of it. There are melodies, and the guitar work is smokin' hot on this one. That dude with the Jew-fro probably doesn't get as much tail, and so he practices...and it shows! Dude pulls out some major fireworks in comparison to prior efforts. The whole band sounds a little tighter and a little looser as a unit.

Admittedly I've only listened to half, but I don't think the album warrants 14 cuts anyway. Thanks, but I'm cool with 10 or 12, a half hour and change. For those who already like 'em, this will be a nice addition, I'm sure. For those who don't, well...skip it. I suppose it's worth some spinnage, but I'm not hearing the hits yet. The Strokes are a "grower" band, though, so maybe...ah, fuck it. I'll probably just listen to Early Man again.

Bottom line: The Strokes rock OK.

-Mike

www.thestrokes.com